So, have you seen the new J.C. Penney commercials that rip off The Breakfast Club? Or, as Pajiba put it: "Do you know what it’s like to feel your heart atrophy in under 60 seconds?"
So many things about this commercial piss me off. Let's start with the fact that apparently 45 kids have Saturday detention. Although, the commercial is so lazy in ripping off TBC that they never actually say that the kids are there for Saturday detention. They could very well be in homeroom, unsupervised. Because the only adults shown are the parents dropping off the kids at the very beginning. But the Principal and Carl the Janitor are the best! They don't even warrant a cameo?
Back to the kids. While the actors in the commercial are racially more diverse than the original TBCers, they all look exactly alike. Obviously they're all dressed in JCP fashions, but they're all dressed as preppy as possible. The girl who I guess is supposed to be Ally Sheedy's character is dressed in a magenta polo-style dress. WTF? I'm sure JCP could have found something black in the Juniors dept to throw on that actress. The entire fucking point of the movie is that 5 kids from different social groups are thrown together for one Saturday and they bond and become friends until Monday morning when they go back to being strangers. Ok, that last part doesn't actually happen, but I'm guessing.
The point of the commercial? I'm not entirely sure but I think it's "You're all exactly the same already, you might as well wear cheap JCP clothes."
Also, I hate the cover version of TBC's theme song they use in the commercial. So happy and uuugghhhhhh. That just reminds me of how happy all these little fuckers are to be in Saturday detention. They're losing an entire Saturday! They should be pissed! Not all smiley!!!!!!
Raise your hand if you think JC Penney should have kept the scene where the kids all smoke pot. Thanks, Ab, for raising your hand. If they kept the pot scene it would at least give the kids a reason to be so happy to be in Saturday Detention.
I really can't go on anymore, or my head will explode. Thanks, JC Penney, for taking a cherished film and bastardizing it so that you can sell some shitty clothes to children who don't know any better. But you forgot one thing: These kids you're selling to? It's their parents who are buying. And their parents were teenagers themselves when The Breakfast Club came out. Way to fuck it up, JCP marketing.
JC Penney sees us as they want to see us: as mindless idiots who won't recognize that they're trying to capitalize on our fond memories and sentimentality by putting forth a lazy hack-job version of a generation's favorite movie. I rarely shopped JCP to begin with, but I'll avoid it like the plague now. To paraphrase John Bender: "Eat my shorts, JC Penney. Eat. My. Shorts."
NOTE: I didn't upload the pictures through blogger because I'd already uploaded them to Flickr and it seemed like a serious waste of time to upload them all again. Unfortunately, blogger automatically crops the pictures so almost all of the pictures below are missing the far right side. For most pictures it's ok, but there are a few where Brian or Joe are cut in half. Click on the picture if you want to see the whole image.
I actually had to type out this entire thing twice, so y'all better like these pictures. At least lie to me and tell me you did. I just got this camera about two weeks ago, so I'm still getting used to it, which is why some of the pictures are fairly blurry. Also, some of the blur comes from the fact that I prefer shooting stage shots without a flash.
Anyway. The show, like always, was wonderful. My friend Abby and I got to the show very early, because we wanted to grab something to eat and catch up on gossip before the show started. This would turn out to be a very bad idea. The chicken quesadilla I had made me sick to my stomach for the rest of the night. I wasn't so bad that I was actually vomiting (I obviously wouldn't have stuck around if that were the case) but it was bad enough that I left not too long after the show ended instead of hanging out like I normally would have.
Let's just get on with the pictures/stories, shall we?
First up was Brian Wright. For some reason I have more blurry pictures of Brian than of anyone else, which you'll see. Even in pictures where everyone else looks fine, he's blurry. I don't have many pictures from his set because I took them all from our table because I'm lazy, so not many turned out decent enough to use.
The Tragedies' keyboardist taking a break onstage.
Here's a video of "Morning Cigarette." Yes, I filmed it from my table, which is why you'll randomly see people walk in front of me.
Next up was Tony Lucca. Before I go on to the pictures, I'll tell you a story about the Super-Drunk Lucca Superfans. This guy and this girl were obsessed with Tony. It was to the point of being weird. After the show Abby and I were sitting down at a table a few feet from where Tony was talking to some people. Mr. Super-drunk Lucca Superfan sat down at our table (uninvited!) and kept like drooling over Tony. "Dude, Tony Lucca is right there! RIGHT THERE! I can't believe you guys aren't excited... The next John Mayer is RIGHT THERE! Look, he's right there!" Eventually I got sick of his "right there!" shtick and bitched "Yeah, I have eyes. I can see him. If Abby were to fall over backwards, she would knock Tony over like dominos. Dude, just be cool!" I really wasn't feeling well, usually I just say the bitchy things in my head or wait for the person to go away, but this guy would just not give up. Even after I said all that, he still kept talking about Tony so Abby just started talking to me about whatever random shit she could think of (like her shoes and the MTV movie awards). As weird as Mr. Superfan was, Ms. Superfan was weirder, only because she was Super-super-Drunk. I'm surprised she could stand upright.
Anyway, my great view from the table that I had during Brian's set was blocked during Tony's set by a man that, I swear, had to have been 7 feet tall and 4 feet wide. It was ridiculous. So the only pictures I have are taken when I got off my lazy ass and went around to the side of the stage by the merch table.
Tony and a giant blue microphone
More of Tony and the giant microphone, and here his mic seems to be hitting him in the face.
Here Tony is in the process of being possessed by the ghost of Art Garfunkel, which is weird, because Garfunkel isn't dead.
I don't have any videos from Tony's set because I didn't feel like standing on the sidelines long enough to film one. But even though I couldn't really see anything, he sounded great.
While the audience dispersed between sets, Abby and I took the opportunity to snag a spot right up by the stage, so I got some really good pictures of Joe's set. I won't post commentary on all these pictures; I think they're fairly self-explanatory.
(This is the only example where the automatic cropping is actually helpful. In the full version, there's a creepy guy standing on the right that I really wish I would have cropped out before I uploaded the image to the internet.)
Tony Lucca is still being plagued by the giant blue mic.
I think this is Abby's favorite picture:
This one's really blurry, but it's one of my favorites
Brian "The Blur" Wright
You can't tell (and I didn't feel like taking a panoramic shot to fit them all in) but there are 8 musicians on the stage at this point in time.
Lap Steel, Lucca, Wright, Firstman, other keyboardist, bass, drums, tambourines. 8 musicians. If I recall correctly, they're playing 'Mrs. Rosenthal.' It was the last song before the encore. Also, Brian's right forearm has disappeared.
And, as I promised, here are the videos. If you are willing to wait 3x as long for it to load, you can watch the videos in high quality. (You might have to go to the actual page on YouTube for HQ)
"Fight Song" Fun Fact: at about 20 seconds in, you can hear Mr. and Ms. Super-Drunk Lucca Superfan shout something I can't understand at Tony.
"Breaking All The Ground" Fun Fact: Keep your eyes on Brian and Tony in the very beginning, they do a very entertaining little do-si-do.
"Saving all the Love" (partial) Fun Fact: At about 1:28, you can hear Abby say to me that this song is "another reason why I'm going to get kicked out of seminary school." Other reasons she jokes she'll be kicked out: swearing like a sailor and making fun of strangers. I'm very upset that my memory card ran out during the second chorus, but it has inspired me to buy a 4gb high-capacity memory card for the next time Joe (or, really, anybody) rolls through town.
Also, It's not Abby that yells "How Old?" in the video, it does kinda sound like her voice, but I distinctly remember that coming from somewhere off to my right, and Ab was to my left.
As much as I like all of my videos, had I known Joe was actually going to play a certain one of his requests, I would have saved the space on my memory card. Sadly, I missed my chance to get a video of Joe performing "Wedding Song." When I realized he was playing it, I thought about grabbing my camera, but it was inside its case which was inside my purse which was on the floor, and once I got it out I would still have to delete some stuff and by then we'd be pretty far into the song. But it was lovely.
Anyway, after the show ended, I got a glass of water and we sat down at a table to wait to say Hi to Joe (if you can remember way back to when this epic post started, you'll recall that this is when Mr. Super-Drunk Lucca Superfan sat down with us). I switched the memory card in my camera to the teeny one that you get when you buy the camera (you know, the one that holds like 12 pictures.) I still wasn't feeling well, and for those of you who are concerned about my health, these three pictures pretty much sum it up:
How I felt:
Putting on a happy face:
Done making faces:
Now, you may be wondering why I even bothered hanging around if I wasn't feeling well. One of the reasons is that Abby is the person who first introduced me to Joe's music. She saw him open for Jewel years ago and the summer we worked together at a camp (we were also roommates) she played his cd for me and the rest is history. So I owe her a lot. This is the first time she's seen him since that first show.
She did get her picture with Joe, but I won't post it because I haven't had a chance to ask her if she would want me to post it.
And, despite my protesting that I didn't want my picture taken because I would look sick, Abby and Joe insisted that I looked fine and so these pictures were taken, with Ab giving direction:
"Look sick!"
"Ok, now take a real one." And I still looked sick.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the pictures, videos, and stories. If you made it all the way through, you're awesome.
We'll start off with the plan that I'm most sure about (about which I'm most sure?). Those of you who have seen me in the past year or so know that my hair is getting really freakin' long. Every time I go to get my hair trimmed Cari asks me how long I'm going to grow it. Well, I've never had an answer. But, I've made a decision. I'm going to grow my hair out for the next few months, and then around Thanksgiving/Christmas, I'm going to cut it all off and donate it to Locks of Love. Here is a recent picture of me with my long hair (and my hair is curled in this picture, so be sure to add a few inches to get a real idea about the length):
Actually, the way I'm leaning forward in the pic makes my hair look longer... That's actually right about where my hair hits if it's straight and I'm standing upright.
And when I get it cut, I think I'm going to go with a little Jenny McCarthy or Julia Stiles.
I think I like the Julia better, but I'm pretty sure that's just because I like Julia better in general. I'd feel better about myself taking a picture of Julia Stiles in to show Cari what I want as opposed to a picture of Jenny McCarthy.
Anyway, the other future plan, the one I'm less sure of (the one of which I'm less sure?), is the plan to get a Masters in Library Science online from the University of Illinois. I like working in the library. Sure, it's not as exciting or cool-sounding as when I was doing publicity for a film festival, but it's also not as stressful and I don't have to deal with bitchy "stars." And I'd have access to tons of books and I'd get to be smarter than other people. Also I'd pretty much have the freedom to move anywhere, which is big for me. I don't like feeling stuck, so I want the option to go to either a rural or an urban setting. There are libraries everywhere, a Librarian can find a job in any state. They're like nurses and strippers.
One thing: If I do become a librarian, will someone please buy me this poster?
After much debate, I bought the Canon Powershot S5 IS.
So far it has taken great pictures. I've only owned it about four hours at this point so I haven't had a lot of time to play with it. The only complaint I have is that, as you can see, it's not a small camera. In fact, it's fairly massive. Not quite a dslr, but it still has some heft to it. I'm worried that it's too big, that I won't be able to use it like I want to because I'll be too lazy. My Florida family is in town and we're having a 4th of July celebration tonight, so I'll take some pictures then and try and get used to the camera. If I can't, I guess I can take it back, even though there will be a 15% restocking fee, which kinda blows.
I know this is going to come as a shock to you, but do you know what happens when you have a paying job but very few expenses? You end up with a lot of cash and nothing you need to spend it on. I'm still used to my apartment living mentality: I have no money, but I can justify entertainment purchases every once in a while. I still think that way, I'm still justifying all of my unessential purchases. I spent my tax return money on a trip to South Carolina and the collectors dvd sets of Buffy and Angel. I thought of that money as "extra" money. And since I haven't been spending, I've unintentionally been saving my money. Which is nice, because there are a few expensive things that I need and/or want.
First: I really need a new digital camera. My old one is... old. The zoom button is breaking and the battery is wearing down (not holding a charge as long) and it's from the ancient times before digital cameras could record real video (it'll only record in 15 second blocks.) I really like taking pictures, but I mostly only take pictures at parties and concerts, so it's really not necessary to have a DSLR. Even though that would be hella cool. I've been reading product reviews all afternoon and I think it's down to one of the Canon PowerShots and one of the Sony Cyber-shots. Sony is winning so far in that I can get a cool looking camera in red. Yes, I'm superficial.
Speaking of red and superficiality, I want a new laptop. I don't necessarily need it, but mine is getting quite old, and it's about time to upgrade. I'm thinking of getting a Dell, possibly one of the Studio computers. In red. It's so worth another $25 to get it in red. All I really do on my computer any more is the occasional word document and Sims. I know the Sims is a really lame game when you think about it, but it is really graphic-intensive and hard on my poor Lappy. Once we get the wireless set up in this house (I think I'm going to have to pay for the router, because it will only benefit me) I'll be internetting on it too, and as well as my Toshiba has served me over the years, I'm ready for an upgrade, and it wouldn't hurt to have the built-in web cam.
One more thing on the shopping front: Despite vowing not to buy any more books for the rest of the summer, I've bought two new books this past week. One doesn't actually count as breaking my promise, because I knew that I was going to have to buy it anyway. So I threw $10 down on the last book in the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants series. It's one of my semi-guilty pleasures, and the second movie is coming out this August, and from what I've read it pulls stories in from all of the last three books, so we'll see how that works out. The other book I purchased I have no excuse for. I bought Jonathan Safron Foer's Everything is Illuminated. I saw the movie a while ago and I've been wanting to read the book. I was just goofing around on half.com last night and ended up buying it, and part of it was because the seller mentioned that it had the pink cover. I don't know why that appealed to me, but it did, so pretty soon I should have a pink copy of Everything is Illuminated arriving at my doorstep.
UPDATE: I've been going over product reviews online all day, and I think I like the Canon Powershot s5 IS. My only worry is that it's going to be too bulky, so I think tomorrow after work I'm going to go to Best Buy and check out how it feels. I want a camera that's more advanced than the standard point-and-shoot deals, but by no means do I need a digital SLR. I really like that this camera comes with a dedicated movie button, which is pretty sweet. My goal was to spend no more than $500, and this one should come in on budget when I add on the protection plan. It would be nice to be able to fit it in my pocket like the camera Laura has, but I want it do do more than just take pictures of my drunk friends. I mean, that's a nice feature, but I'd also like to take pretty pictures of flowers. I also like that this camera has a swivel LCD, which, to quote VMars from memory, is "nice for overhead shots and ground-level macro shooting." So, this may be my new camera, depending how I feel about when I actually have it in my hands.
Actually, the way I'm leaning forward in the pic makes my hair look longer... That's actually right about where my hair hits if it's straight and I'm standing upright.
