The Sausage King of Chicago

Crimes Perpetrated by Ferris Bueller (and Accomplices) During His Day Off.

You're welcome.

Shopping Win

Today I shopped the sale rack at Charlotte Russe and bought two new skirts for work, a new purple/orange top, and the best Christmas shirt ever (see below), all for under $13 total. The best part? One of the skirts I bought for $2.99 is eerily similar to this skirt at Express selling for $69.50. Muahahah!

Cringe

I'm not a super huge Smashing Pumpkins fan, but I am still supremely disappointed/creeped out that Billy Corgan is apparently dating Tila Tequila. Eeeewwww. Corgan brings his own aura of creepitude to the table, but I can't look at pictures of Tila for more than a few seconds without feeling like I need to disinfect my eyeballs.

Mostly I feel disappointed in Corgan. Judging by the supreme elitism exhibited by hardcore Smashing Pumpkins fans, I assumed Corgan would be way out of the walking VD's league. Corgan was never on my list of celebs I'd like to sex, but he's definitely off now.

True story: I once worked with a girl who was a hardcore Smashing Pumpkins fan. At the time "Tonight, Tonight" was one of my favorite songs (I was 19), and I made the mistake of sharing this with her. Her response: "It's a good song, but real Smashing Pumpkins fans don't have favorites. We love them all equally." EYEROLL. Have you ever been in a situation where you know for sure that every single person within earshot wants to punch someone in the face? What's worse: "Tonight, Tonight" was on a mix cd we had to listen to each week, so we got to hear her feelings on "real" Smashing Pumpkins fans multiple times. Ugh.

Name that Tune FTW

A few weeks ago I was watching TV late at night when I thought I heard Pot Kettle Black in a commercial for Observe and Report. I wanted to verify, but I couldn't find the clip on youtube and I didn't see the commercial again, so I assumed I had been hallucinating. Happens all the time. Well, I finally found the commercial on youtube, so I know that I'm not actually going crazy. This commercial is a little different than the one I've been seeing, because the one I've been seeing actually plays less of the song, therefore earning me more points in Mr. D's game of "Name that Tune." True story: in first grade I kept falling asleep during Mr. D's music class and apparently it was such a problem my parents had to be called. I guess I was the first Wilmo student to be bored to Zzzzs by Mr. D. I would not be the last.

[Points to self] Winner. Also: If you go to the actual youtube page for this video, you can see me win at Name that Tune in the comment section.

You're welcome.

Found on Jezebel.